Love Is, And Will Always Be, The Foundation.

"I grew up in a family that never spoke about mental illness. My grandparents were pastors so we've always had a soft spot, a sense of humility if you will, towards people who were different or needed a helping hand. The issue with this starts with responsibilities. Growing up in a religious setting set the mind state that whatever went wrong was "the devil." Not that you should work as hard as you pray, but giving it to Jesus & he will fix & heal all. I started having kids at the age of 25. While some might feel as if I should have been accomplished or in the "know" of life, I had no clue what God had in store for me. My first born was everything. From the moment he made his mark in the world I knew I would forever be changed. Now I know that sounds cliché but I dreamed of him, I felt his enormous aura before he was physically present.

My firstborn was diagnosed with autism. The spectrum has become so wide over the years that it was hard to accept that something might be "different"... not wrong as I was told, but different. He was, and proves, to be an extraordinary kid. He is always adventurous, curious and smart. He seemed to be ahead of his time as a baby. As time went on we noticed that he didn't have the verbal capacity as other kids his age. So against my and my significant others upbringing, we sought help. Help for the whole family in understanding, acceptance and knowledge. Love is and will always be the foundation for his father and I and it was known that if anything, the kids we once dreamed of would know exactly what that felt like if not with anybody else, with us.

My son got help. He started early education and began to thrive. Outside of that on the home front we had so much on our hands, but not more than we could bare. My grandparents always told me "The Lord would never put more on you that you could bare." What I didn't know was that I had to give 50% work & 50% faith to a situation that was beyond me. Everything is a test of growth & this was my moment. I had to learn and unlearn and reevaluate how & what I was taught. This shit was not easy and still isn't but its totally worth it. Patience. Patience is what he's taught me. Patience and understanding. Which in retrospect is all I've been formed to give.

A year later we had an unexpected pregnancy. Here arrives his brother. Again in the midst of us figuring out the first kid, we added another addition to the world. He as his brother did thrived as a baby. Especially because he was given the opportunity to be a part of the training that was bestowed upon his sibling. But as he got older, he portrayed behavior that was not acceptable in either of our upbringings. Lets be honest, the first thing most black families go to when they don't understand something is either physical or mental abuse. Although I am not against a good ass whooping here and there (it builds character ), I knew it wasn't the route I wanted to go with or that he needed from me.

Fast forward to now. We are realizing that he might have a disability as well, which scares us. But we are now prepared to face any and everything with love, support, understanding and patience. We struggle at times but it seems to be the way to go. We had a daughter 2 years back and she is heaven sent. I feel as if God knew we needed a little more help to teach things that weren't taught and to push us to not only be good parents but great people. She as her brothers is an amazing kid, smart, caring and funny. She teaches us all to be gentle, kind with our words and hands and to be more responsible for our actions. My kids are a handful (to say the least), but patience and understanding is key. Having kids that are so different yet require the same amount of attentiveness mentally and physically is draining but we continue to grow. Growing into our purpose in each others lives and the world."

- Domonique M.